Saturday, November 26, 2005

Guest of the Week 2!

The second installment of the wildly popular Guest Blogger series. This week's entry comes from Sports Medicine PhD. candidate, Sarah Robinson, of Madison Wisconsin.

Topic: Stalinist Russia.


"The New York Times ran an article a few weeks ago about the high-fashion handbag. They interviewed dozens of women who were willing to drop $3,000 on the latest hot purse. Most were in their late 20s or early 30s, and making around 40k a year. Asked why she would spend twenty-four hundred dollars on a Chloe handbag, one woman responded that she 'didn't want to look like a grad student.' Bitch.

As a poor grad student, I'm torn on this whole high-fashion thing. On one hand, I think that people who spend 800$ on a pair of shoes ought to be lined up against a wall and shot, or at the very least deported to a worker re-education camp in Siberia. On the other hand, I really want a pair of Gucci boots.

Here are the fashion trends I currently hate:

Louis Vuitton handbags. If you have niether taste nor class, but want everyone to know that you spent a lot of money, just get an ass-ugly handbag with a designer logo all over it. These are the tackiest thing in the world, surpassed only by......

Dooney and Bourke handbags. The tacky ripoff of the tacky Louis Vuitton handbag, yet somehow seen as a status symbol in my home state of Wiscosin. Wear it to the mall and impress your friends.

Ugg boots on fatties. I don't hate the Ugg boots. I don't like them, but they can work on some people. But kids, you really have to have some skinny thighs to pull this off. Remember, the boot should be the thickest part of your leg."

Guest Blogger Review:
Not really on topic, though inclusion of worker re-education camps in Siberia and the utilitarian bias lends the piece a "5-year Plan" vibe. References to fashion trends most of us have never heard of earn Ms. Robinson points, though use of the term "fatties" must be weighed against the triumph of taking New Yorkers down a notch. "Bitch," indeed; well played!


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